Ok, I was really good about keeping this up before. I don't know what happened?? Maybe it was all the moving or the kids or the hubby or who knows! Anyhow, I am going to try and keep this up this time for good. I need something to clear my brain.
I was up last night and couldn't sleep because I had a million and one things going through my head. In 9 days I turn 34 and for some reason I chose 11:00pm at night to start thinking about that. Who does that?? Me, that is who. I started thinking about all of the things that have passed me by because; I either wasn't smart enough or just wasn't paying enough attention at the time. It's not really regret. It is things like; if I had been smarter when I was younger, I would have paid my bills on time and then my credit wouldn't be all screwed up. I started thinking about all the bills there are and trying to fix my credit. After I thought about each different thing, I would think I am too old to do things differently or to fix things. Then, I started to think I was having a panic attack and still couldn't sleep.
This morning I was going through all the blogs I like to read as I do everyday. I read Mckmama's blog post and I could not believe how much she sounded like she was talking about me. She was completely honest about her marriage and how she treated her husband. It is funny cause before I even sat down at my lap top I started thinking about the same things she was talking about. What is wrong with me?? I began reading all of the comments that went along with her post and realized how many people are the in the same boat. How do I change my ways??